Why Quick Fixes Keep High-Achieving Women Stuck (And How to Make Changes That Actually Stick)
Recently, I came across this statement: Change is hard, but staying somewhere you don’t belong will destroy you.
It made me pause. Is that true?
I’m sure you also know the saying that we only change when we have to - when something becomes unbearable. Too uncomfortable.
This consequently means that change isn’t really that hard once the alternative becomes impossible. One fuels the other. What’s actually hard, in my opinion, is choosing the right change.
Awareness always comes first
When you haven’t learned to truly listen to yourself, it’s likely you will just make surface changes. Quick fixes that look like progress but actually don’t touch the deeper truth. They feel like movement, maybe even look like it, but they don’t bring alignment.
If we start cultivating self-awareness earlier - through journaling, reflection, and quiet thinking time - we won’t wait until the pain forces change upon us. We’ll feel the pull long before it becomes a push.
Maybe we’ll even accelerate the process ourselves. Because once awareness grows, you can’t unsee what does not fit. What’s unaligned actually starts feeling impossible to tolerate, long before the real unbearability starts.
But how do you know which direction to move when you can’t yet see the destination?
Awareness is your roadmap. It gives you the first step: the realization that something no longer fits, and the feeling of what might feel right instead. Not the end result. Just the first action point.
It will bring you curiosity. Once you understand that there is no clear path, you can approach it from a place of playful experimentation. Life really does not have to be that serious.
Start dreaming. Start envisioning. Start asking: If not this… then what?
And this is key! Because if you skip this part, you’ll likely just end up in another version of the same place.
Change is a ripple effect
You shift one thing, and suddenly you see all the other things that no longer fit. You realign one part of your life, and everything else begins to ask for the same reassessment.
And this is also the reason why you simply can’t imagine where the path will lead you. You won’t even know which next part will ask for realignment, because one thing leads to the next. You can’t just skip ahead.
But there’s some reassurance among this uncertainty. Because while we don’t always know where we’re going, we know deep down what feels peaceful and what doesn’t. What feels like flow, and what feels like resistance.
Follow the pull.
How to build the awareness
Maybe you’ve been disconnected from your inner voice for a long time. Maybe you lost the right frequency to hear it.
Rebuilding that awareness is possible, but it takes time. Be patient and start practices like journaling, meditation, and quiet times just for breathing and thinking. No distractions. Just you, with yourself.
Start noticing the small things - the basic instincts every body has. Are you hungry or thirsty? Are you tired? Everyone has these signals naturally, so it’s a good starting point.
The power of self-awareness
If you want to build a life that is true to your values, a life that you dream of, self-awareness is non-negotiable. If you don’t have it, you run the risk of just doing what someone else says will work for you.
Inspiration is wonderful, but imitation never brings alignment.
True, lasting change is born from intrinsic motivation. From your own why. Otherwise, it will always drain more energy than it gives, because you’re trying to live someone else’s truth instead of your own.
Aligned choices don’t mean easy choices
They still bring fear. After all, you’re stepping into the unknown.
BUT! They also bring peace. That quiet, grounded knowing that this step, right here, right now, is something you do just for yourself. It’s truly your choice.
And once you find this inner peace, the next feeling you have to embrace is surrender. Trust.
Trusting in yourself. Trusting in the process. Trusting that this change, this ripple, will lead you exactly where you’re meant to go.
Ready to skip the quick fixes and actually make sustainable changes?
You don't have to figure it out alone. Check out my complimentary gifts to help you get started - like the “Becoming Her” Workbook.
